Aug 16, 2007
Karl Rove Who?
So, Bossy is right now touring colleges with her teenage son. They are looking under every rock across New England. See that Honda that just passed in a haze of loose gum wrappers? That’s Bossy. Honk.
As we all know Bossy and her teenage son woke up early Monday to begin their 6-day, 5-state tour. That’s a lot of miles but lucky for Bossy she had her trusty copilot to keep her entertained:
Bossy’s first mission was to take a photo of each State Welcome sign to commemorate their trip. This is New York’s state greeting:
And this is Connecticut’s:
We Interrupt This Regularly Scheduled Bossy For The Following Disclaimer: Bossy also totally forgot to take a photo of the sign in New Jersey. She will make it up to you with the following joke:
Q: Why are New Yorkers so depressed?
A: Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.
We Now Return You To The Bossy Already In Progress.
In no time at all Bossy and her teenage son arrived at their first stop: Yale University. Yale is located in New Haven Connecticut and is the third oldest college in the United States and a member of the prestigious Ivy League. Its beefy endowment is largely due to the fact that Yale graduated many prominent heads-of-state, Nobel Laureates, and famous actors.
Yale is all:
And all:
And all:
Bossy’s son was especially smitten with their freshman residential quad:
Bossy and her son ate a delicious Thai dinner in New Haven and after three minutes sleep a refreshing night, they awoke for the second day of their adventure.
Bossy was a little preoccupied for the first half-hour of their journey because her gas tank was empty and she couldn’t see any gas stations within twelve hectares of any highway exit. She also couldn’t see any coffee places. No coffee. Not even any mini-markets. This is the only thing Bossy could see:
But soon her snoring son trusty copilot navigated Bossy toward an exit with various gas stations featuring burnt vanilla nut plastic coffee. Bossy’s son was particularly insolent happy that Bossy chose the only gas station that was not attached to the donut shop or the egg-and-cheese-sandwich place.
In fact Bossy and her son had a huge blowup little tiff about it that carried them from the car into the gas station store and up to the cash register. Bossy was actually so busy screaming nurturing her son’s breakfast needs that she forgot to put cream in her coffee. She drank every drop anyway. And she didn’t dare admit her gaff to her trusty copilot:
In no time at all the Honda crossed the state line into Massachusetts:
And this is the part when the sky fell on the road:
In no time at all Bossy and her teenage son arrived at their second stop: Harvard University. Harvard is located in Cambridge Massachusetts and it’s the oldest college in the United States and a member of the prestigious Ivy League. It has the beefiest financial endowment of any academic institution, which is partially used to fund the largest library in the world. Harvard has graduated many prominent heads-of-state, Nobel Laureates, and one famous actor.
Harvard is all:
And all:
And all:
Bossy’s son was especially smitten with Cambridge’s infinitesimal
world-famous Harvard Square where people gather to sell useless maps play music and juggle.
And here’s something you probably don’t know about Boston: people speak with a Boston accent.
Finally, in summary of her first two days’ experience, Bossy leaves you with this query:
Q: How do you get to Harvard Business School?
A: Practice, practice, and this bridge.
Not only did I love the OJ post, but I think I loved this one as much.
You’re a funny mofo, girl.
I am impressed that bossy is able to get up WITHOUT the coffee. I actually need to have it as I rise or within a certain number of minutes of rising or I sprout extra heads.
I can’t WAIT for the next installment!
Bossy’s son must be a smarty pants if Harvard and Yale are options for college.
And surely Bossy isn’t old enough to have a college-age child!
By the way, taking pictures while driving. So you can share your adventure with your devoted fans…That is dedication (and a little dangerous?)
Enjoy the rest of your trip!
Is Brown next? You are motoring through my neck of the woods! I still remember when we did the Grand New England College Tour for my older sister and my parents called it “vacation.”
I just went to URI. Seemed simpler that way. But Go Bossy’s Son!
Wow! Thanks for letting us see these places – as many of us will never see Harvard or Yale! Congrats on having raised a son who can consider these schools as an option! You must give yourself a big pat on the back (and your hubby) for raising a great child! My son is 10 and so far is a good kid – I’m hoping he stays that way and follow his dreams of being a scientist or architect… we’ll see.
Bossy is one kick-ass mom to be piloting this trip…I think I would require coffee intravenously.
I’d totally be offended at the Jersey joke, but it’s a little known secret that Jerseyites proliferate those jokes more than anyone else. It keeps the riff-raff out. I’m impressed with the Ivy-reaching Bossy offspring. He can totally keep his polo pony wherever he wants.
vuboq can’t think without his morning coffee … special coffee … coffee with a little something extra … ok … a lot of something extra … ok … fine, I do shots of tequila to get going in the morning. Is that so wrong?
And, where do you keep your polo ponies at Harvard?
Bossy’s teenage son is supercute and apparently quite bright. He makes me wish my daughter was much older. She sleeps a lot too.
Bossy’s son made some excellent educational choices. I am partial to Harvard because my Granddaddy taught there, but my cousin went to Yale – which was a family scandal -but he turned out fine in the long run. Does it have to be East Coast? Stanford is lovely and the girls don’t have to dress so warmly out there. Bossy’s son might enjoy that.
Uh, Bossy. You do know that New York and New Jersey are NOT part of New England, right? Especially, New York.
I don’t think you did Harvard Square justice. Of course The Tasty isn’t there anymore – best, best late-night drunk food EVA! Heart Attack Special = Big fat burger with a fried egg on top!
Dear Bossy,
Please don’t let your son come to University of Texas. He is WAY too cute for my age…
Heart
Evolving
You’re a better woman than I… all that morning shit and no coffee. ick. no cream?
Lived in Boston for many years, of course since I have no money I was on the other side of the Charles, not in rich-dish land Cambridge. Yeah, the square is a bit of a joke. But the buskers in the T station are usually pretty good.
Hey Bossy!
Like you, I was surprised when I moved to Boston and people actually sounded like extras in Good Will Hunting.
Did ya pahk yah cah in Hahvahd Yahd?
(sorry.couldn’t help myself…)
I hope when my sons are that age we’ll be taking a tour like yours rather than a tour of the best DeVry Institutes of Technology the south has to offer.
Delurking b/c I’m laughing so hard. I’ve lived in MA my entire life, and love it when people come to visit, and are shocked by the accents. I’m partial to Hahvahd, b/c my cousin went there. And b/c CT frightens me.
Wait, you didn’t call AG when visiting Harvard? Could have given you a personal tour and all.
I personally recommend Columbia. I’m so over Harvard. Now if he wants to go to a liberal arts school, Amherst is his choice. Not as busy as Cambridge, but a decent education.
bossy’s college bound son should get you properly caffeinated everyday for a year.
Bossy’s son doesn’t even want to think about Duke or UNC, Chapel Hill, huh? Then again, why would he… this IS the SOUTH after all. But, the liberal South. Pinky swear.
And, I don’t even want to think about what I’d do to my son if he started complaining about anything BEFORE I’ve had my coffee. I’ve left him screaming in his crib on many an occasion to get my first morning cuppa. I guess they’re a little harder to keep in check after puberty, eh?
P.S.
Bossy’s son is ridiculously handsome. No shocker, though. Look at his parents!
Holy cow, I think your son should meet my daughter.
The Polo pony girl maybe was trying to impress him ??
Fun post! Good luck to your sin’s future adventure and road ahead!
haha, noelle stole my comment. my mom’s a food/travel writer in NJ and got all upset when she had to write an article about the “untold gems” of NJ or something like that, because she didn’t want people to actually start thinking well of nj and then come cram up our nice parts with their tourism.
also, the college of w&m would like you to know that TECHNICALLY they are the oldest college in america, since we – uh, i mean, they – had the first charter for any higher learning institution in the country. harvard just started actually BUILDING their silly ol’ school first, thus stealing our totally-technically-older-no-really-i-swear thunder.
yeah bossy. way to spread those good lookin’ genes!
owww!
just kidding. sort of.
Congrats on a son who has obviously worked very hard to be considered at these wonderful schools.
Ummmm … can I introduce him to my daughter?
Bossy and her son visited Boston and didn’t say hello to Margalit. Big mistake!
Harvard Square is the WHOLE neighborhood, not just the little tiny intersection. It isn’t small, it’s got great restaurants and stores, and do not make fun of my alma mater.
Bossy’s Varicose Veins are all….
Did you paint any stair wells along the way? What about Princeton?
Anyone who somehow gets the word ‘hectare’ into a blog post is my new hero.
Well, that and your saintly patience.
Shockingly enough, I never heard that New York joke, so coffee was soon spewing out of my nostrils as a result!
Coffee with cream, that is. Black coffee? I second that Ew!
Bossy’s son is HOTT! Biddy doesn’t normally go for younger guys (or even ones her own age) but she might just have to make an exception for Bossy’s Boy
VERY cool photos.
And I’m just as broken up as I can be about you having to drink coffee without any cream in it. That’s just wrong. And bitter, to boot.
Ditto “oh the joys” – I live in the Triangle of those three illustrious North Carolina institutions and if I was a young coed, dewy and fresh from living with ma and pa, I’d love to go to any of the three (but esp. UNC, go heels). My husband attends UNC and has for a ridiculously long time. Make sure Bossy’s son doesn’t major in something requiring a PhD to get him a job, no matter what he does.
PS – my good friends got engaged on that very bridge.
I meant ditto Meghan. I got the comment tags flipped. So, ditto the Duke, UNC, NC State comment, in other words.
Just call me smooooooth.
I learn so much from reading Bossy, like…
…her son is really HOT!
Now don’t take that the wrong way because:
1). I am in a committed relationship, and
2). Bossy’s son is way, way, way, way, way, way, way too young for me, and
3). I think he likes girls (eewwww!).
I’m just pointing out that he’s going to be quite the heartbreaker if he isn’t already.
I cannot believe you drank that coffee. I mean…*shudder* I just can’t get over it.
My personal choice is Carnegie Mellon. I just have twelve years before we have to visit it.
Come see Washington University in St Louis..I can show your son a good time..I mean, oh my what do I mean..I’m married. I’m blushing….
Nevermind….
I am demanding a full investigation. There is no fucking way you are old enough to have a son that age.
Oh!! How can you say that about NJ?? It’s a beautiful state when you find time to explore. I will be the goodwill ambassador of NJ and my wife and I will take you on a hike in the forests and mountains just to prove it.
Of course you may get eaten by a NJ bear who doesn’t take kindly to your NJ jokes.
When I moved from CA to NYC, that involved a month-long road trip. I had planned to take pictures of every state sign, but yeah. Some are impossible to photograph (like OR/WA – in the middle of a busy bridge-highway) and some are just useless (*cough* NJ *cough*). A couple just said “state line.” Those were funny.
Sounds like a productive trip though.
It’s a strange pastime, ensuring that you snap all those sign posts. I think it should be compulsory that a whole new set of signs be installed 500 yards prior to the sign that you want to photograph, an early warning sign of the sign of the sign that you really want.
Cheers
The early morning empty highway picture? Totally made me feel sleepy, dizzy, and very much in need of better coffee than what you got. And breakfast.
Yale? Harvard? Damn girl. Be proud. Just steer him away from my company when he graduates. Unless he has a sense of humor, is nice, and is fun….we need more of those types of Yale/Harvard grads.
Peoples of teh intenets? Bossy isn’t laughing at New Jersey, she’s laughing with it.
You mean to tell me you came all the way to New England (which as someone already pointed out NY is not a part of) and could not find a Dunkin Donuts???? How did you DO that???
And don’t forget – he’s also The Artist Formerly Known As Bossy’s Husband
HUH….explain please.
OK, how to get to Harvard Business School? “This Bridge” – freaking hilarious!!!!!! That shall keep me laughing for a long time! Nice pictures, and smart son!
Oh fer CHRISSAKE! You drove by my house (oh yes you did, to get to Hah-vahd from Yale you probably drove by my freaking HOUSE) and you didn’t tell me you were passing by? Hmmph. Some friend you are.
*pouting*
But, dude, your son is really cute. And wicked smaht too? He should really go to Harvard.
Bossy doesn’t look nearly old enough to have a son who is old enough to be visiting (ivy! league!) colleges!
I love this blog!
I have very sleepy co-pilots also.
You must have a very smart young man on your hands!
Congrats!
If you’d just send him to a nice local junior college, you could have slept in.
You left out what both schools are:
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
(didn’t know you were that rich or I’d ask you to adopt me)
Love hearing about your adventures! We only did a one state tour of colleges. O, wait we only saw one college the community one a couple of suburbs away
We are now looking to transfer to a four year. Still same state though. What great options your son has! Looking forward to the next installment.
Yay, Bossy, you must be so proud of him! Harvard and Yale! Just curious, though… where does one park one’s polo pony at Hah-vad? In the yahd, or the squa-yah?
Ahhhh the memories. I went to school in Boston and a very good friend of mine went to Yale. What an exciting time in your son’s life!
Ah, the bridge to the Harvard B school…mecca beckoned for my college friends and I – little did we know how nerdy those B school boys really were. Don’t let him over the bridge.
Teenage son must be very smart! Harvard and Yale: very impressive. But those are the only two American colleges I know anyway (European, got to give me a break
Also, you look no where old enough to have a teenage son!
Seems like just yesterday that I made that trip with my parents. We looked at about 15 schools from Davidson to UVA to Dartmouth to Harvard, driving up from Florida. I ended up at Washington and Lee, and I’ve never regretted it.
Bossy – You are the funest mom ever! When he falls asleep in route to your next destination, you must draw on him. This will truly prepare him for college.
Meg loves Bossy’s sense of humor more and more with each passing entry. Keep ‘em coming, BOSS! And do be careful taking photos whilst driving…
I agree that Bossy’s son is Adorable. (Note the capital “A”)
Hey, welcome to Massachusetts! Did you pahk your cah in Hahvahd yahd? (I slay myself.)
Can I be the five-billionth person to tell Bossy that her son is super-duper cute? And obviously smart, too. Next visit, Princeton?
Yeah, the Wawa’s peter out somewhere around central Jersey.
And I love that joke – except my version asks “Why are New Yorkers atheist?”
Umm, if Bossy’s son ever wants to chat about a certain school that Bossy didn’t mention (damn, I’m hurt) that’s in Rhode Island, Bossy’s son should please send me an e-mail. I’m one of those crazy ass alums. Besides, the hubs went to Hahvahd, and he didn’t have nearly as much fun as I did. Plus, I was taught by full professors, while he was taught by irritated and irritating grad. students.
Just sayin’.
I can’t believe you didn’t call me! You could have popped by the Dynamite pad for fresh brewed coffee WITH CREAM and homemade blueberry cobbler.
And I wouldn’t have ogled your son AT ALL.
(maybe just for a second – in admiration of your beautiful genes)
Seriously. Next time you must call me. Hope you had an educational trip!
On our visit to Harvard Square, my husband (wearing our toddler son on his back) almost got into a fight with a homeless man who would not leave us alone (even after I gave him $):o
I need to remember not to drink fluids when reading your blog. Orange juice hurts coming out nasally.
P.S. I don’t feel dirty saying this,
your son? Hot.
I can say it because there’s only a six year difference.
Oh geesh. 6 years. Maybe that is dirty.
Harvard? You go, Bossy!
Harvard also graduated Herman Munster, Conan OBrien and Weezer.
I’ve run over that bridge many times. It’s a nice passage over the river (love that dirty wahtah, boschton, your mah home) except in winter. Got my first hepatitis shot after I fell into that river.
Harvard has the best freeking dorms in the nation. And the prettiest indoor track anywhere.
Hey Bossy!
i just read pretty much your whole blog
about your college tour with Matt
and i must say that it seems like you guys
had quite the trip! haha.
my mom reads your blog everyday
and laughs out loud everytime.
i read them every so often
and can’t help but laugh too.
this one especially caught my eye.
it sounds like many ventures i’ve taken
with my family. haha.
i loved the part about you arguing with Matt
at the rest stop and being so preoccupied
that you had to drink BLACK coffee! (ewww)
also the fact that the pictures were so amazing, as they always seem to be.
what kind of camera do you have?
and do you take those pictures
while driving?!
that’s skill!!
i’m sure Matt gives you crap about it. haha.
i’d be scared to death.
oh yeah, and i know i’ve said it before
but i have to say it again.
Matt is just so effing hot,
the pictures of him make this
all the more fun to read.
i love that one of him outside Harvard.
amazing. =]
stay awesome!
<3 Blair.
(Beru shirt girl).