Feb 28, 2008

Where Is Bossy’s Brother Raul Now That She Really Needs Him?

Bossy doesn’t actually have a 76-year-old brother named Raul. Fidel Castro does. But if Bossy did have a 76-year-old brother Raul, she would insist he take over as President of Cuba contest official because readers reader?
Have you ever tried to write over 150 contestant names on microscopic scraps of paper that you ripped with your very own Carpal Tunnel Syndrome hand?

Before Bossy announces the winner, let’s take a look at some of the guesses. As you may remember, a wrapped birthday present was left on Bossy’s front porch with the following card attached:

The contest was to please oh gah decipher whose name was signed on the bottom of the birthday card so Bossy could sleep at night thank her generous friend. And you dear readers reader were up to the task—once again proving how much Bossy needs you on Her Team. Especially if The Game is combining letters in wholly ridiculous ways.

Shall we?

You guessed the signature belonged to Martha. Or Marsha. Or Mulva or Delores. Or Nolla, Bella, Molly, Modla, Nana, Mufasa, Mona, Medusa, Noodla, Marla, or George Clooney. Also popular were Magda, Moss, Nosla, Mesea, Nicola, Nelda, Moesha, Missoula, Modo, Barack O’Boyfriend, and the ever popular Molive.

There was also Marla, Melissa, Molla, Nalla, and Jimmy Hoffa. Mina, Maia, Nesla, Maho, Holla, Molli, Volla, Nasa, Maflo, and Adam Heath Avitable.

Or how about Motha, Mama, Stella, Mafia, Mosea, M. Osla, Nefla, Mazola, Mollaxo, Nolsa, Ursala, Melba, Leosa, Uosra, Lunsa, and Constance. And John Cusack. And Mepea.

By far the most popular entry guess was Mosla. And the ending would be so happy if Bossy only knew a Mosla. But because she doesn’t know a Mosla—or a Mafla or a Nosla or even a Mogula—Bossy decided to throw all 155 contestant names into a hat:

Next Bossy selected a name from her hat:

Congratulations Jaueoooo! Oh. Bossy supposes she needs to put on her reading glasses.

permanent link to post

60 comments

1. 1
   on February 28th, 2008 at 9:57 am
   Luann said:

   but but but…does Bossy know who it’s from yet?


2. 2
   on February 28th, 2008 at 9:58 am
   BOSSY said:

   Just: nope.


3. 3
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:05 am
   Blog Starr said:

   Post it on Craigslist’s missed connections:

   You left a phallic shaped gift at my door. I need to see you again to thank you.

   You might get some good calls.

   (I posted on my blog to say I think you are a Pisces. Am I at least right about this mystery?)


4. 4
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:14 am
   we_be_toys said:

   Does it matter where it came from? It’s a kick-ass olive dish.

   I love Bossy’s contests!

   Nice Minnie Pearl touch, the tag on the glasses – stylin!!


5. 5
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:14 am
   All Adither said:

   BOSSY’s morning hair is better than my going-out-for-a-date hair.


6. 6
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:15 am
   The Domestic Goddess said:

   Jen O’s a lucky lady. I am lost without an olive dish (because, I eat olives. Not.)


7. 7
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:15 am
   Avitable said:

   You’re not going to believe it’s from me, are you?

   I missed you over at my blog yesterday. Thought you would have had a great comment.


8. 8
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:19 am
   Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said:

   I like the tag. It could become fashion.

   Or you are a modern Minnie Pearl.


9. 9
   on February 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am
   Liz said:

   Dig out those holiday cards!! Whoever is kind enough to leave a birthday gift must have sent you a holiday card, and is sure to have signed it in the same way (but with a return address or other family names as well…)


10. 10
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am
    Momo Fali said:

    Whoever that card is from, obviously doesn’t realize that the truest peace and happiness will come to your soul when you find out who the hell they are.


11. 11
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:38 am
    Mosla said:

    You don’t know a Mosla??? That’s the THANKS I GET for my thoughtful phallic gift?

    I take BACK my hearts and butterflys!

    -MOSLA


12. 12
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:43 am
    Jenn @ Juggling Life said:

    Hasn’t Bossy noticed the youthful trend of leaving the tags on your baseball cap–obviously Bossy is just rocking that trend in a “middle-aged” sort of way. Way to be fashion-forward!


13. 13
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:47 am
    vuboq said:

    I’m still a little bamboozled over the concept of an olive tray. I thought olives only went in martini glasses.

    Congrats to Jen O.


14. 14
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:48 am
    Rachel May said:

    You should totally check out Mir at WantNot and ask her about the online random number generator she uses for contests….

    At first, I didn’t want to suggest it for fear that your next contest winner post would not be as funny, but then I remembered that (HELLO?!?!) it’s BOSSY we’re talking about here! Doh!


15. 15
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:53 am
    David said:

    OK, put the hat back on.


16. 16
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:55 am
    Biddy said:

    um bossy? have you heard of a little site called random.org? it’ll totally keep your carpel tunnel from flaring up during contests. though, it doesn’t make as good a photo shoot…

    i’m still dyin to know who it was! you would think Medusa would pop by your blog and be all “hey, seriously, it was me”


17. 17
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:55 am
    RuthWells said:

    Oh, if only it HAD been The Clooney…. I’d have staked out your house.


18. 18
    on February 28th, 2008 at 10:56 am
    Nikki said:

    Congratulations Jen O.! I didn’t submit a guess since Google Reader just recommended your blog to me this morning, but agree with the Molla guessers – that’s what it looks like to me.

    I like the glasses. Rip the tag!!


19. 19
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:00 am
    Karla said:

    This is very exciting. If the winner is the same Jen O that I am thinking of, and really, how many Jen O’s can there be? Then I think her and her expectant belly will much enjoy some steamed olives in the microwave safe olive dish.


20. 20
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:03 am
    anastasia beaverhausen said:

    If only I had been able to pull myself out from under the bed long enough to enter this contest. Not, of course, that I would have been able to decipher the signature. Far from it. But I do like to enter (and summarily lose) contests.


21. 21
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:05 am
    heart shaped hedges said:

    Wait, I kinda need to know the name!

    I spent a good amount of time retracing that scrawl in my brain, trying to scientifically determine which letters they could possibly represent…and which names it could create, so, will there be an answer?

    Surely Bossy’s generous birthday XO friend is a blog reader, right?

    HEY, MOSFLARLOA can you please tell us your name????


22. 22
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:09 am
    heart shaped hedges said:

    Also, FYI on the random contest winner generator deal…..

    My husband told me that if you do that, it’s considered a lottery or something and it’s illegal if you arent registered or something, or maybe it’s illegal in some states, so, dont do it before checking out the LAW.

    I would hate for bossy to get in trouble, like, did you see the I Love Lucy episode where she has a drawing for a TV for a “charity”…the charity being her and Ethel’s trip to Europe? Big trouble for Lucy!

    PS. I think I will have a contest tomorrow….hmmmm…gotta find a gift card to re-gift!


23. 23
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:16 am
    Belle said:

    Ohh god, the mystery is driving me insane. I’ve checked your blog 3 times this morning hoping for an answer. AND…..No Answer. I am going to go curl into a ball and cry, not only did we not know the answer, but I didn’t even win the contest!


24. 24
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:17 am
    Doug said:

    OK here’s the left brain part of me coming out.

    List the people who know your birthday.
    Cross reference that to the ones who know you like olives.

    Assuming that that list doesn’t yield the thoughtful giver, you have the cities from your Excellent Roadtrip map. (this of course assumes they are a blogger and actually want you to visit them)

    Take that along with the square root of your son’s tuition, divided by his SAT scores and multiply by the inverse of the temperature on Jupiter (tomorrow at noon) and you’ll have your answer.

    see how simple that was?


25. 25
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:24 am
    Hotdog said:

    Bossy is so very resourceful with her reading glasses. We should all take note.


26. 26
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:32 am
    Mr Farty said:

    I had this really brilliant comment, but doug beat me to it.
    Sigh.


27. 27
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:51 am
    Nilsa S. said:

    Hahaha – a very fair and just way to choose the winner.


28. 28
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
    Jen O. said:

    I WON!!! I’ve never won anything as spectacular as an olive dish!!! (Trust me…I’m not being sarcastic. I once ate an entire LARGE jar of olives, including the loose pimentoes…and then drank the juice. I’m just saying – THIS IS AWESOME!!!)

    YAY ME!!!


29. 29
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
    Candy said:

    I should totally have won, though. Maybe if I change my name to Jen O. Or Marsha.


30. 30
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
    corrie said:

    UUUummmm…… I can’t call this closure…

    I really need to know who left such a thoughtful card and note and gift!

    I guessed it was Stella~ thinking your beauteous daughter did a very thoughtful surprise to you from the Dane…

    I just hope Bossy will solve this mystery soon!!

    P.S. I LOOOOOOOOVVVVE the olive dish.. Jen O is very lucky today!!


31. 31
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
    Sister Honey Bunch said:

    That is going to drive you nuts not knowing.


32. 32
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
    Manic Mommy said:

    So, you either have a very nice neighbor or a stalker. Great.

    I hate olives so I didn’t enter the contest. I would have gone with NSA. It’s a gift from Condoleeza Rice.


33. 33
    on February 28th, 2008 at 12:56 pm
    Dr. Monkey said:

    I’m digging the stern look Bossy is giving us in the last photo. I promise to be a bad monkey so you’ll give me that look all the time I hope, hubba hubba.


34. 34
    on February 28th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
    Maria R said:

    Bossy’s random drawing looked suspiciously like the random drawing I had on my blog…except I had a cuter “draw-er”…and I only had, um, well, 20 little pieces of paper so didn’t get carpel or need random generator….so I think bossy is copying ME…and I didn’t want that stupid old olive tray/ash tray thing anyway.

    Good job Jen O. I’m very happy for you.

    I am NOT a sore loser.


35. 35
    on February 28th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
    dgm said:

    Is it too late to change my answer to “Raul”?

    Fair enough. Congratulations, Jen O!

    Next time, you’re goin’ DOWN, sistah!


36. 36
    on February 28th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
    Lisa said:

    It’s not like we really know who sent the olive whatchacallit. This is so frustrating!!! It is driving me crazy! Maybe Bossy did it cuz she is trying to do a little spring cleaning!!!!!

    Hey, the hair is not as bad as I guess Orlando Bloom’s. Did you catch the story how his girlfriend says he bathes and washes his clothes every couple of weeks! OMG!


37. 37
    on February 28th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
    Jacki said:

    I wish I had friends who left nice gifts on the front step for me to find.


38. 38
    on February 28th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
    Sarah is Ok said:

    I had something to say about your post, but then I read Jen O’s comment about drinking the olive juice and threw up a little in my mouth. and then again when I typed it. I think the dish went to its rightful owner.


39. 39
    on February 28th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
    dexter said:

    I never had an olive dish. I just dump them on the table and try to stab them with toothpicks.


40. 40
    on February 28th, 2008 at 5:46 pm
    Jami said:

    I never had an olive dish either. Unless the jar they come in counts as a dish in the rest of the world like it does at our house. If we’re going upscale, we provide a fork to spear the olives instead of just forcing everyone to use their fingers to fish ‘em out.

    All of which is by way of saying that some of us could REALLY have used an olive/pickle dish/ashtray.


41. 41
    on February 28th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
    TLB said:

    it’s MAYA.


42. 42
    on February 28th, 2008 at 5:59 pm
    TLB said:

    it’s MAYA.


43. 43
    on February 28th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
    Annie said:

    I forgot to post my guess for an entry, what a shame. I really needed a classy olive dish. My guess would have been Moola, as in.. that person wants you to send them some. So do I. Maybe it was me, then??


44. 44
    on February 28th, 2008 at 6:24 pm
    natalie said:

    i can’t wait to find out who it was who gave you the olive dish. seriously. i wonder if they will ever come forward and admit it.

    hmmmmm….


45. 45
    on February 28th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
    kate said:

    okay, fine, it was from me. you’re welcome.


46. 46
    on February 28th, 2008 at 8:10 pm
    meleah rebeccah said:

    Love The Glasses


47. 47
    on February 28th, 2008 at 8:29 pm
    Flea said:

    Soooo … who is it?


48. 48
    on February 28th, 2008 at 11:30 pm
    Heidi said:

    I’ve decided it’s Magda. Whether you know her or not.


49. 49
    on February 29th, 2008 at 3:26 am
    Kelley said:

    Raul is the most awesome name. I am honouring you and Raul by naming my next period after him. They name hurricanes don’t they?

    And lovely to see that you are still embracing that inner curl. I am embracing my 4 straightening irons.


50. 50
    on February 29th, 2008 at 6:09 am
    William said:

    Now I am dying to know who it is.

    My guess would have ben trisha


51. 51
    on February 29th, 2008 at 6:59 am
    Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You said:

    My question is……..

    How the hell did you know that was an olive dish? LOL


52. 52
    on February 29th, 2008 at 10:36 am
    heart shaped hedges said:

    Hey Bossy,

    Can I announce my *contest* ??

    Ok, just did….

    Did M*%la call yet to take credit for the new olive boat?


53. 53
    on February 29th, 2008 at 11:07 am
    Phoenix said:

    So you don’t know a Noma? Cause that’s truly what it looks like to me. Or Noooooma maybe? Happy belated birthday.


54. 54
    on February 29th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
    Optimist said:

    I still think you are being stalked by 50’s era Japanese Kaiju’s.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mothra

    I almost died laughing when I read Vuboq’s comment. I thought it was Mothra too – but he beat me to the punch – and was much funnier than I could ever be!

    xoxo Bonnie in Houston


55. 55
    on March 1st, 2008 at 1:07 am
    Glennia said:

    Did anyone guess Mother? If Bossy’s mother is deceased, then it could be a Norman Bates-y type thing someone is trying to pull on you (and I hope that your mother is alive and enjoyed the day of your birth both then and now).


56. 56
    on March 1st, 2008 at 11:05 am
    HappyCampers said:

    Oh that would SOOOOO drive me bonkers! I found your site through June Cleaver Nirvana (one of my coolest neighborhood friends!) and you are Hi-Lar-EE-Us!


57. 57
    on March 1st, 2008 at 1:16 pm
    Kristabella said:

    I think it was TOTALLY Mufasa. That rascally lion. Oh wait. He died in a stampede.


58. 58
    on March 1st, 2008 at 7:09 pm
    Neil said:

    I can’t decipher the name, but as a professional handwriting analyst, I would say that person has A LOT of emotional problems. Look at the curvature of the strokes, and that intense XO.


59. 59
    on March 2nd, 2008 at 7:02 pm
    donna in mid michigan said:

    CONGRATS to Jen O. One time the neighbor girl and I ate an entire jar of SLICED dill pickles. It was a NEW Thing–hamburger Chips as Pickles!! Yah. That was a Long time ago.


60. 60
    on March 3rd, 2008 at 8:09 am
    markira said:

    We just can’t let it go. Must…know….gifter…

    Nadia?