May 2, 2007
Bossy’s All New Naturalization Test.
How many stars are there in our flag?
Answer: 50, not including John Travolta.
Who elects the President of the United States?
Answer: The electoral college Katherine Harris.
For how long do we elect the President?
Answer: Four years Hell to Eternity.
What is the Constitution?
Answer: The supreme law of the land That thing lining the bottom of
Barney’s crate.
What are the duties of Congress?
Answer: To make laws To pass bills that are vetoed by the President.
What is the Bill of Rights?
Answer: The first 10 amendments of the Constitution The Right to elect Bill one more time.
Who is the Speaker of the House?
Answer: Bossy, unless she has laryngitis.
Who said, “Give me liberty or give me death”?
Answer: Patrick Henry Laura Bush.
What is the 50th state of the Union?
Answer: The State of Anxiety.
Who was Martin Luther King, Jr.?
Answer: Exactly.
Name one of the Constitutional requirements to be eligible for President.
Answer: Must be a natural born citizen Must be a natural born doofus.
How many Supreme Court justices are there?
Answer: Nine About six too many.
Who was the first to adopt the Declaration of Independence?
Answer: Angelina Jolie.
What is the name of the President’s official home?
Answer: The White House The Danvers State Insane Asylum.
Who sold the Louisiana territory to the United States?
Answer: France James Carville.
Who was the President during the Civil War?
Answer: Ronald Reagon.
What special group advises the President?
Answer: The Cabinet The Kitchen Sink.
What are the two major political parties in the U.S. today?
Answer: The Democrats and the Republicans The 2007 Academy Awards and the Greenwich Cotillion.
Which President freed the slaves??Answer: Abraham Lincoln Barack O’Boyfriend.
These Are Sample Questions From The New Naturalization Test Which Even Bossy Couldn’t Pass.
Well, shoot. If they ever throw pop quizzes at us citizens, I am SO screwed. Perhaps I should print out your answers and commit them to memory.
Question: Do you mind if I link to you?
You see, every so often I post a few links to sites that I enjoy. I especially like to do it when I am feeling really lazy and can’t come up with anything original. I would like to link to you during one of those times. May I?
Yup, hell to eternity sounds about right.
I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry. Laugh because you’re funny; cry because the situation sucks.
where can I get a pair of hanging chad earrings?
where can I get a pair of hanging chad earrings?
Even though Pres. Bush may be goofy, I think there is something darn right cute about him.
I had the hots for Bill, too, while he was in office!
Don’t think I could have “done” Jimmy, though!
I recently found your blog. I love it!
Very funny, a bit cheeky, quite witty!
LOL! They have the same nose.
I always wondered what shrub was lining the dog’s crate with. Also, he shows the dog more affection than he shows Laura. Go figure.
Wait! Bush has three arms in that last pic! Aaack! Run like Hell!!!
And what do you get when you mix a Bush with a Dick? Screwed.
recently was referred to your blog-love it –today’s was fabulous!lifted those grey clouds-poof.
I love it!
Awesome! Do you happen to know what the pass and/or fail average on that test is?
BOSSY = AWESOME
The Angelina one was especially good. Nicely done.
Yah, what is Up with those 3 arms??? Was Rover helpin’ him do the salute correctly?
BTW Bossy, I definitely had you in mind as my “other” candidate on the Unity ‘08 site.
Good stuff!
State of anxiety hmmm i wonder how many people live there? Clever quiz makes me want to make up my own version…
When will I remember to put on some Pampers before I read your blog???
I think technically all of our laws have to be approved by the Queen before they can go on the statute books. The reason I’m not sure this is true is: it’s never happened in my lifetime!!! And we have a lot of laws.
At least your prez is elected. No, wait…
I have never been so satisfied with any previous political advisor and would recommend BOSSY to all my friends.
Have you ever written for SNL?! Bossy, you are wickedly funny. We must get you a gig on live TV.
Heh, I thought those were empty percocet sheet earrings…
So, confession: Bossy photoshopped away the security guy standing in the background but she forgot to erase the guy’s arm. The ass in the photo, however, is real.
damn, sam.
brilliance from this quadrant of the interwebs is blinding.
I want you on my team!
Hahaha… those’re great answers. I don’t think they encourage smart-assishness, which is really a crying shame. I figure, if you give a creative answer you really should get credit. Damn those beaurocrats!