Feb 20, 2008

While Bossy Was Off Deciding If She Could Afford Scott Kelby’s Digital Photography Book For $11.43, Martha Stewart Bought Emeril.

But Don’t Worry, He Only Cost $50 Million. Maybe Only $70 Million If Certain Benchmarks Are Achieved. Bossy Isn’t Exactly Certain What That Means, But If It Has Something To Do With Benches, You Better Believe Martha Stewart Can Do It. Read About Her Latest Man Purchase Here.

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36 comments

1. 1
   on February 20th, 2008 at 8:52 am
   William said:

   You would think she would buy someone more attractive.


2. 2
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:05 am
   Sister Honey Bunch said:

   So, Emeril’s her beyotch now, isn’t he? BAM!


3. 3
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:07 am
   Grandma J said:

   Nice catch, Martha. 50 million for your own personal cook…and it’s Emeril LIVE! I’m just a little worried that he may end up like the headless Ken doll if Martha pulls too hard on that leash. That collar looks like it has some electrons or something that might be painful…look at his face!


4. 4
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:09 am
   blackbird said:

   I’m thinking of buying a chef too…
   I just can’t decide which one.
   Jaime Oliver might be good but he’s got that speech thing -
   I know! I’m gonna pick up Anthony Bourdain.


5. 5
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:17 am
   BOSSY said:

   Blackbird: Don’t let soNOTcool hear you talking about Anthony Bourdain in an ownership way. She has kitchen knives and she knows how to use them.


6. 6
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:19 am
   Say What? said:

   I never even saw the real estate listing for Emeril – I might have put in a bid. Damn that Martha gets everything!


7. 7
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:30 am
   kim at allconsuming said:

   Is this like her Nepalese sherper?

   Blackbird is going to have to fight me for Bourdain.


8. 8
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:35 am
   Maddy said:

   We’ll watch the stock market then!
   Cheers


9. 9
   on February 20th, 2008 at 9:37 am
   Momo Fali said:

   She’s going to sautee him in garlic and serve him for dinner.


10. 10
    on February 20th, 2008 at 9:40 am
    Jacki said:

    And here I feel guilty when I buy a $50 shirt.

    Stay away from Scott Kelby.


11. 11
    on February 20th, 2008 at 9:49 am
    Doug said:

    I guess she had to hurry up and get it done before the Ebay fees went up.

    I have a side project for you (actually Alpha Mom). I saw a vibrator that hooks to your Ipod on someone elses blog. I couldn’t tell if it was a joke or not, and there’s no way for me to search on something like that without being fired.


12. 12
    on February 20th, 2008 at 9:50 am
    All Adither said:

    That collar looks like it might chafe.


13. 13
    on February 20th, 2008 at 10:02 am
    Junebug said:

    Wow Martha’s looking pretty fit and trim in that picture. She must actually be using her trainer’s advice.


14. 14
    on February 20th, 2008 at 10:04 am
    The Domestic Goddess said:

    Now all she has to do is buy Rachel Ray and it’s a monopoly. Dang it, now Emeril’s stuff is gonna cost more.


15. 15
    on February 20th, 2008 at 10:21 am
    meleah rebeccah said:

    Martha is just crazy. And she frightens me.


16. 16
    on February 20th, 2008 at 10:25 am
    Grandma J said:

    The Domestic Goddess,

    Actually, Emeril’s stuff will probably be cheaper now. With all Martha’s powerful and lucrative contracts, Emeril will be coming to a K-Mart near you!


17. 17
    on February 20th, 2008 at 10:47 am
    Emily R said:

    I really like that his collar matches her shirt. That woman can accessorize!


18. 18
    on February 20th, 2008 at 11:02 am
    Undomestic Diva said:

    So glad you’re doing the Scott Kelby thing. He rocks. He’s my secret luva. (Secret being that he does not yet know.)

    Undomestic Diva


19. 19
    on February 20th, 2008 at 11:23 am
    Melanie at BeanPaste said:

    I must say, this purchase makes me question Martha’s taste level. Emeril? Really? If you’re going to shell out that kind of change, I would go for someone more au courant. And less annoying. And certainly less hairy.


20. 20
    on February 20th, 2008 at 11:32 am
    cynthia said:

    I want Jaime Oliver.

    And I am willing to take it outside if need be….


21. 21
    on February 20th, 2008 at 11:50 am
    sillysally said:

    starting the Anthony Bourdain bidding now at….uh….87 cents? sorry, post-holidays, cash a little tight. (whips out credit card)


22. 22
    on February 20th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
    Tootsie Farklepants said:

    I predict a chapter in Martha’s next book on how to fashion a man collar out of handy household items. It’s good to be Martha.


23. 23
    on February 20th, 2008 at 12:58 pm
    Strizz said:

    It’s a good thing.


24. 24
    on February 20th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
    dlyn said:

    Well Scott Kelby is profiting from your blog – I bought his book after someone mentioned it here. You should ask for a cut bossy.


25. 25
    on February 20th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
    Foolery said:

    Maybe she’s just making a Man Suit. A hirsute Man Suit. It puts the lotion in the basket . . . BAM!


26. 26
    on February 20th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
    Chesapeake Bay Woman said:

    Unattainable benchmarks = new show: Emeril Dead. Shazam!


27. 27
    on February 20th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
    Wayne said:

    What’s funny is she thought she was buying a backwards limerick, but doesn’t know how to spell, oh and is dyslexic.


28. 28
    on February 20th, 2008 at 8:27 pm
    erin said:

    BAM!


29. 29
    on February 20th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
    operagal said:

    holding up bidder paddle:
    Bourdain is at a buck now.Be careful – I have a proxy in.


30. 30
    on February 21st, 2008 at 1:27 am
    Dr. Monkey said:

    I may be for sale if Bossy’s price is right.


31. 31
    on February 21st, 2008 at 9:24 am
    HRH said:

    This is pure Bossy genius. Martha’s got nothin’ on you (except maybe a few bucks).


32. 32
    on February 21st, 2008 at 10:45 am
    Sally said:

    After scrounging another 87 cents out of the sofa, I can now up my Bourdain bid to, uh, $1.74. And 2 ChuckECheese tokens. Take that, OperaGirl!


33. 33
    on February 21st, 2008 at 10:47 am
    Sally said:

    uh, sorry, OperaGAL. (dyslexic, finance challenged me….)


34. 34
    on February 22nd, 2008 at 3:51 pm
    Inner Keening said:

    I hear you can buy Graham Kerr dirt cheap, but he’s not as funny now that he’s off the sauce.


35. 35
    on February 23rd, 2008 at 8:41 pm
    Criquette said:

    She knows it’s all about the pork fat. Brings new meaning to the saying “wham BAM, thank you ma’am.”


36. 36
    on February 25th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
    Heather said:

    Oh, Emeril. How far you’ve fallen.