Nov 8, 2011

Ten-Word Tuesday — Fright Or Flight

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Bossy has been doing a lot of plane travel lately, which is known as flying. Last week it was Los Angeles for a conference, and this week it’s Las Vegas for let’s just say not a conference. This made Bossy reflect on her own history of flying.

When Bossy was a girl, she got all of her cues about how one should react to the notion of airplane travel by studying her mother. Naturally these lessons took place in the airport bar, where Bossy’s mother would plant herself a couple of hours before takeoff. In the very early hours of the morning.

It’s not that Bossy’s mom was afraid of flying. No. Bossy’s mom was afraid of dying. Situated in that airport bar, Bossy’s mom would repeat the mantra there’s no other way to get my ass to France while fretting that the enthusiastic efforts of the bartender would result in an infinitesimal slosh of wasted gin over the edge of her glass.

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It’s not that Bossy’s mom looked or acted scared once her airplane was in the sky. No. She just looked and acted as if she were already dead, her eyes clamped shut against the improbability that 187,000-pounds of aluminum could lift into the air.

It should surprise no one that Bossy inherited this fear of flying. “What’s that noise? What’s that noise? What’s that noise?” Bossy would ask in the general direction of anyone unfortunate enough to have purchased the seat next to hers.

One time Bossy admitted to her sister-in-law that Bossy didn’t like to fly. “You and every other control freak in the world,” Bossy’s sister-in-law said.

Meanwhile Bossy’s other sister-in-law is Japanese, and Bossy always thought there was truth in her sister-in-law’s pronunciation of flight attendant: Fright Attendant.

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Bossy’s father was much more practical in matters of air travel. “See that plane?” Bossy’s dad would say, pointing out of the family’s high rise window toward a flight pattern over the Delaware River. “How many planes do you see in five minutes along that very air path? How about in two hours? How about in a month, a year? And all of them are doing just what they’re supposed to do.

Bossy assumed doing what they’re not supposed to do meant crashing.

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This cheered Bossy considerably, but it wasn’t until she rented the movie Pushing Tin, starring Bossy’s husband John Cusack that Bossy understood there are many variables connected with flying, and that many people — not just one pilot, one imagined very hungover pilot — are working together to control those variables.

In the movie, John Cusack plays an air traffic controller, and for some reason the idea that people sit in towers across the land guiding flashing shapes across screens made Bossy feel all kinds of better about planes.

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Bossy can describe her relaxed attitude toward flying now in this way: It’s a quiet place to think. Which is always good.

Which is what today’s Ten-Word Challenge is all about. In exactly ten words, can you tell Bossy about your attitude toward flying?

And be sure to check back later today for the best flying stories on the web.

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