Oct 12, 2007
This Just In: Al Gore Wins For Biggest Face.
As anthropogenic greenhouse gas concentrations increase, and Earth’s
near-surface air and ocean temperatures elevate, and the sea levels swell, and extreme weather events multiply, and the glaciers retreat, and the disease vectors shift, and agricultural yields change—Al Gore’s face expands.
Since he invented the Internet, I’m sure he won’t appreciate you talking about his expanding face. He might turn this whole Internet around!
Age and food. Frightening.
His inconvenient truth is the double chin.
But he doesn’t want to be Prez … yeah right. Hillary scares the socks of him and he’s too afraid to admit it!
He looks Chinese upside down.
Quick! Someone tell Val Kilmer!
I’m trying to figure out how this man pays the bills. He DONATED the prize money.
At least chunks of his face aren’t falling off into the Arctic Ocean and drifting south. Well, parts ARE drifting south, but that’s a different thing all together.
That AL Gore is A-OK.
If only America could have realized what AG knew so long ago…
I love Al Gore. Yes, his face is big, but so is my ass so I’m reluctant to make a snarky comment. However, I will mention that I take a twisted delight in his winning as I recently was told by a woman I work with that An Independent Truth was based on the information of only ONE scientist. I can’t wait to cast a smug glance at her in the teacher’s lounge. Aren’t I shallow?
So THAT’S what happened to my ass!! Here I thought it was all those Milk Duds.
I had something very witty and spectacularly (? is that even a word?)fascinating to say, but then soNOTcool made me laugh and now I can’t remember anything.
Perhaps he is using his face as a storage facility for greenhouse gases so they will not be released into the atmosphere.
Has this fact been offered up as proof of the overall theory? It seems incontrovertible to me. And maybe he can get a two-fer for the “Super-Size Me” movie.
It’s from sukkin up all those cow farts to svae the world
The inconvenient truth is that overeating causes ones posterior and anterior to expand. Mary Alice hates that.
He’s super groovy and he should stick his tongue out at W. and say “IN YOUR FACE!”
Yes, I am mature.
Yikes. Is it just me, or does he look like a Baldwin brother!
Dude sounds like Eeyore with a list.
Me thinks he is bigger than the cutest purse eh-ver! That goes for Alec Baldwin too.
Little boy pulling his mother’s skirt in the grocery store standing behind Al Gore, “Mommy, Mommy, look at the head on that one.”
Can I get a Nobel Peace Prize, too? My Prius gets 60 miles per gallon.
I love that man.
I love that man.
I love that man.
It is large, isn’t it? What if it keeps growing?
seriously. how did this man not win that election 7 years ago? I mean the only prize W could win would be “Best Village Idiot” at a county fair in Texas.
however, the head is large, but better a big head than a big ass.
Poor Trump! He lost again.
So very, very scary. This man does not photograph well, people.
That’s how he sealed the ozone layer.
It doesn’t look like he is too healthy with face and eyes puffed up like that-doesn’t he?. I am not going to pass any judgement unless I know his exact health history.
However I can pass judgement on his public conduct – he is a visionary, no doubt, both on his push to bring in internet for wider adoption and in raising the awareness of Global warming.
Wish we had more people like him.
My vote went to the guy who invented Super Glue, which is the glue they used to fix my daughters ear (which was sliced open when a snotty kid threw a toy at her head) in the Emergency Room…..THAT brought us a lot of peace!
Seriously. I’m eating ice cream for peace over here. Will the Nobel Prize ever notice?
Turns out that Mr Al was more right than he knew…
Greenhouse gases already beyond ‘worst-case’: scientist (http://agonist.org/20071010/greenhouse_gases_already_beyond_worst_case_scientist)
Sorry to bun yez all out…
The part that wasn’t announced (because the information is classified) is that the real reason he won the prize is that he has been absorbing and storing all of the carbon dioxide emissions in his head the last 10 years or so and is literally holding this planet together.
LMAO!
but as a climate scientist (some of my actual colleagues were in An Inconvenient Truth), I have a HUGE amount of respect to the focus that he’s bringing to the climate crisis
betcha global warming would calm right down, if he would step away from the cheeseburger….
God. He’s aged, hasn’t he.
I thought it was a joke when I first heard it. Like, funny, haha? A joke? But they were serious. Oh, the huge-man-tees!
It looks like his face is going to swell his eyes shut. He may need to cut them open like Rocky did.
Hilarious…
THe man with the ever growing face….
Amazing how Bill’s is shrinking compared to Al’s growth…
he looks like danny de vito as the penguin in batman.
OMG, I almost choked on my peanut-butter cup. Which I threw away, lest my face expand. But then I might win the Nobel! (fishes cup out of garbage …)
Hope that ugly mug KEEPS expanding ’til it fills every TV screen come every State of the Nation speech for the next 8 years.
(Nice, as usual, Bossy!)
He’d make an interesting bobble head!
I still would sleep with him. Does that make me weird?
He is most definitely NOT aging well…what is happening to him – seriously?
ALL BOW TO THE GREAT OZ….
If that’s the effect Global Warming has on Al Gore’s face, then we’d better do something quick, before it gets to the rest of us!
Big head, big ideas, what else on Al is bigger than life? I ask you . . .
Being much older than most of you, I get to slap you on the wrists and tell you to “grow up” enough cynical….keep your eye on the real ball..Al’s message and our earth.
Little known fact: every time you fill up your non-bio fuel car, Al Gore’s face expands .00023 mm.
I’m SO glad someone has finally pointed this issue out !
I heard he suffered from depression after his non-election. It’s probably the side effects from antidepressiva that cause his face to bloat. I know from experience. It’s no picnic.
Donchoo be dissin’ my Al!
I got your “big”, in numbers:
3,829 American deaths in Iraq since the war began in March 2003.
$460 billion spent on the Iraq war to date
Now we’re talking big. Like one big fuck-up.
No matter how his face has expanded – Al Gore won The Noble Prize! I believe he has no reason to worry about the face!
Didn’t he invent the wide-screen TV?