Aug 24, 2011
We Interrupt This Blog For An Earthquake
As some of you may have heard because the entire East Coast won’t shut up, there was an earthquake in Bossy’s area of the country yesterday. The following is a reenactment of events.
It was afternoon and Bossy had just returned from a run and was studying her adult acne in the bathroom mirror:
When suddenly Bossy noticed her hairdryer was walking its way across the surface where it was resting:
That’s when Bossy realized it wasn’t just the hairdryer in motion. There was a very disturbing sound, not unlike when you put a pair of canvas sneakers in the clothes dryer and the machine becomes imbalanced and shakes itself free of its concrete foundation.
Not sure what was going on, Bossy emerged from the bathroom and peeked into her bedroom for signs:
And then Bossy realized the windows were all rattling in their frames:
So Bossy peeked into her daughter’s room to see what was going on in there:
But the only thing Bossy found in her daughter’s room were more windows rattling in their frames:
By this time Bossy had canceled out a few theories about what was happening, such as the Freight Train Passing Very Close To The House Theory and the Contractors Doing Something Weird Across The Street Theory.
Still, Bossy couldn’t figure it out. The word earthquake crossed Bossy’s mind, but there was no way this sustained and not very subtle activity could be attributed to that, because if Bossy was going to agree to live in an earthquake zone, that earthquake zone would have views of the Pacific Ocean.
In confusion, Bossy reached out to touch the door jamb:
And then she placed her hand on the wall:
Every brick and mortar inch of Bossy’s house was trembling and rocking on its mid-century foundation. Being something of a scientist, Bossy reached the only reasonable conclusion to explain what was going on around her.
Bossy ran downstairs to see if that would offer more clues, but all she found were more windows rattling in their frames:
That’s when Bossy realized the lantern that hangs from the ceiling in the corner of the Bossy living room was actively swaying:
Next Bossy touched more things because that always helps when in the middle of an earthquake:
And then, as if someone was turning the volume knob back to zero, the house was still. And everything returned to normal, where normal equals Bossy’s son arrived home from the grocery store and thought Bossy, who eagerly described the strange activity, had finally lost her mind.
That was great image — holding on to the wall as it was shaking. Now that would be a bit disconcerting. And I grew up in the land of sinkholes. One swallowed our school cafeteria at night. We missed all the fun.
–>I was sitting in my office and everyone on my hall walked out of their office at the same time, looked at each other and said, What the Hell Was That?
We had one in ATL about 8 years ago and my then husband blamed the shaking and noise on squirrels running on our roof! When the alarm went off an hour later they were talking on the radio about the earthquake. I made him apologize to squirrels everywhere!
I have been through two BRIEF earthquakes. One rocked the bed and woke me up, and I was confused on what had happened. The next was a “what was that??” episode as it rocked the floor. I enjoyed reading your experience with it. Glad nothing broke in your cute house.
P.S. I have a problem with clothes piling up in the chair in my bathroom.
Olivia has been through the odd earthquake herself, including the one where she awoke to definite shaking and swaying at 4 AM one time and tried to remember if one was supposed to stand in a doorway in an earthquake – or was that in a tornado?
All this thinking wore poor Olovia out so she went back to sleep.
BTW – Olivia thinks she covets Bossy’s house…..
Who’s Olovia? Could it be Olivia?
He he.
You made the miracle of geology easy for me to understand. Especially when you said the word “Boozy”.
That earthquake was felt as far west as Chicago and Milwaukee. We have our own fault line (the New Madrid) so you can just keep your earthquakes there.
After living through a shitton of Earthquakes (with a capital E) in Alaska, I was SO glad we didn’t feel it in TN. Those things are so freaky. Did you feel the pop? I always felt a pop in the air right before one happened. One time at work I watched a vase of flowers travel across my worktop counter. I had to grab it because it was one of those fancy Aalto vases, and my boss would have pinched me if it broke.
I did not feel the earthquake. I was on the phone with my husband telling him what to make for dinner while emptying the dishwasher. He said his car was shaking. But I didn’t think much of it.
I also liked the name “Boozy.” It’s a name I can relate to.
Very cute, Bossy!
I live in California, but had to visit my mother in Illinois two years ago to feel my first North American earthquake.
Speaking of visiting mothers, I thought you lived at your mothers…
Looks like you might be interrupting this blog for a hurricane in a few days.
Here in Colorado, we had an earthquake of our own about 12 hours before yours. I grew up in California so I have been through quite a few quakes, but this was the first one I have felt since living in Colorado. Brought back childhood memories…
Why is daughter’s room so much neater and prettier than Boozy’s?
Bossy sure did a lot in the whole 30 seconds it lasted…
Bossy probably doesn’t remember it but she once slept through an earthquake at about 3 AM in 1973–lasted about 15-20 seconds
An earthquake—ho hum
(West coast bias)
I hate to tell you this, but your little lamp downstairs has a moss problem.
Boozy, did you steal that blow dryer at the Sheraton? It’s mighty perdy?
Since you haven’t posted today, my guess is you are either boarding up or heading for the interior. Stay safe, Bossy girl.
I have so many earthquake memories they are jumbled together–though the really big ones like the ‘71 Sylmar quake do stand out. It’s probably about the way you feel about blizzards. It’s a California thing, for sure.
I slept right through it. At work. In Texas. No problems here. Aside from no rain since the last time we had an earthquake here. About 10,000 years ago.
“The word earthquake crossed Bossy’s mind, but there was no way this sustained and not very subtle activity could be attributed to that, because if Bossy was going to agree to live in an earthquake zone, that earthquake zone would have views of the Pacific Ocean. “
Right??
My first post-earthquake tweet: “New state motto: Pennsylvania – All the excitement of California, but without that pesky ocean and year-round beach weather.”
I feel so dense. I was sitting at work, eating my lunch and chatting with my (I guess equally dense) co-worker about various things, including this big giant crack along the wall of the office that’s been there a long time and seems to be getting bigger. Astoundingly coincidentally (or maybe I did register the earthquake subconsciously), I said, “I sure hope we never have an earthquake or this whole wall will surely come crashing down, along with the rest of the place!” And then I get a text from my sis-in-law, going “whoa!!!! did you just feel that?” and all these people outside are like, “whoaaa, what just happened?” And we two were completely oblivious to the whole thing. HOw could this be?